No More Plus Size Apology Clothes
Posted by Jen Anderson on
Some plus size women make style choices that revolve around making ourselves look smaller. We wear black because it's allegedly slimming. (It isn't.) We don't want to risk showing off a single lump or bump, so we wear clothes that hide our bodies. We avoid bright colors and prints that would draw attention to ourselves. Most of our wardrobe is worn out and faded because we hate shopping.
When we dress this way, what we're really doing is apologizing for our size. We're telling the world, "I'm sorry for forcing you to gaze upon my hideous self. I have done everything I can to minimize the offense to thine eyes."
At the time, I simply couldn't cope with the effort necessary to build a good wardrobe. I hadn't embraced size acceptance so my body and I weren't friends. I suppose Apology Clothes could also be called Denial Clothes. You can't dress a body well without getting a good look at it and assessing what you're working with.
Fabric Matters
I'm not saying that tight, fitted clothing is the only way to demonstrate that you have a healthy amount of self respect. There's a big difference between relaxed-fitting clothing and shapeless shlumpy messes.
Unfortunately, you can't judge the quality of the fabric by what's in it. I can't say all acetate is good and all cotton is bad. If you try on a piece of clothing and it just hangs there limply and doesn't look that good, that may be because the fabric is poor quality. High quality fabric moves beautifully and looks expensive.
Color Is Also Important
Black is incredibly chic as long as it isn't faded. (The Slinky fabric we use for Vikki Vi Classics doesn't fade, so you're safe there.) Wear black because you want to look fabulous. Not because you're trying to hide.
The terrible and wonderful truth is that wearing black won't make you look any smaller, and wearing bright red won't make you look any bigger. Wearing exuberant prints and colors is scary for some people because it announces to the world that you're not going to apologize for your body. It says that you're not ashamed anymore because you never had anything to be ashamed of in the first place.
The thing I dislike most about black is that it shows every bit of lint or cat hair leaving me feeling and looking disheveled. That color is not worth the bother. So glad it’s not on the list of colors most flattering to my skin tone.
When I was younger I left a small footprint, but because I was short in stature no one ever referred to me as normal sized. Even at 125 pounds, I was labeled chunky and big boned. After gifting my family with children my weight crept upward and those body critical remarks became factual. As Jen so aptly described, the results of my transformation brought me to befriend all black clothes, subdued colors and tented coverage! To top it all off a lovely Jamaican nurse once informed me “I’ve seen a lot of whites in my day, but you dear are the whitest!” What was I thinking letting social downgraders dictate my style let alone my precious self worth? Now I’m older, wiser in a wheelchair and a big fan of the movie “Fried Green Tomatoes”…..So ToWanda to them all! I embrace my Plus By Design body, give myself permission to enjoy the colors I fancy and dress to please my own inner beauty expert. We all have the capacity to overcome hatred, it begins with self love, then spreads to the love of others, despite all the nastiness. I refuse to let the negativity consume what short time I have left! I’ve even “pimped out” both my electric and manual wheelchair! Don’t repeat my mistakes and let another moment pass without putting your true self out there. You are more approachable, interesting and comfortable in your skin and a gift to everyone you meet?
When I was younger I left a small footprint, but because I was short in stature no one ever referred to me as normal sized. Even at 125 pounds, I was labeled chunky and big boned. After gifting my family with children my weight crept upward and those body critical remarks became factual. As Jen so aptly described, the results of my transformation brought me to befriend all black clothes, subdued colors and tented coverage! To top it all off a lovely Jamaican nurse once informed me “I’ve seen a lot of whites in my day, but you dear are the whitest!” What was I thinking letting social downgraders dictate my style let alone my precious self worth? Now I’m older, wiser in a wheelchair and a big fan of the movie “Fried Green Tomatoes”…..So ToWanda to them all! I embrace my Plus By Design body, give myself permission to enjoy the colors I fancy and dress to please my own inner beauty expert. We all have the capacity to overcome hatred, it begins with self love, then spreads to the love of others, despite all the nastiness. I refuse to let the negativity consume what short time I have left! I’ve even “pimped out” both my electric and wheelchair