...and other people you don't want to see. Sometimes you need an outfit that says, "see how much happier I am without you?" Oh sure, your confidence and the way you carry yourself can convey that nicely. But you want an outfit that can shut someone up the second they lay eyes on you. Plus size women are used to being judged at first sight, so this should come easy to you.
You can apply this strategy to a frenemy, an old work nemesis, a teacher who told you that you'd never amount to anything...you get the idea. But romantic partners can get under our skin like no one else can. The real goal here is to remind yourself that you're doing fine without them, and to signal that you're no longer available to play their mind games.
Don't Go Overboard
I know how much you want to sashay into your ex's funeral wearing a red dress, but it won't be satisfying since the stinker won't be there to see it. You want to make the weasel realize that he should've treated you so much better than he did. But you also don't want to look like you're trying too hard.
Avoid the temptation to try to make your ex miss you. The goal here is to show them how little you miss them.
This means that you need to be careful that you're not too dressy for the occasion. If you're handing off the kids, you need to dress casually. I know you want to wear something tight and sparkly so your ex thinks that you have a hot date, but it's such an obvious move that it won't work.
Leave Your Ex Out Of It
Maybe your ex didn't like how you look in pink, so you stopped wearing it. It's tempting to wear pink in front of him now to show that you're the one calling the shots in your life now. But if you're wearing something specifically to rebel against someone, you're still giving them some control. And an ex-husband is exactly the sort of person who'd notice that.
Be sure to pick an outfit that doesn't remind you of your ex at all. Which is tricky since we're selecting an outfit specifically to see them. But you want to convey how little you care. The outfit that will really show him you're over it all is one that makes you think about how good you look and how comfortable you feel.
Let's Get Specific
You can't go wrong with a Duster. They add a lot of visual impact to an outfit. A Swing Vest can elevate the look of anything you wear it with without looking too formal. I really like a Swing Vest/Deep Scoop Neck Top combo. A print can bring the carefree exuberance you're looking for here.
For formal events, a sparkly Swing Cardigan or Jacket can help you look effortlessly fabulous.
Try to stay away from Black in this situation. It's chic and goes with anything, but it's too expected on a plus size woman. Try Navy or a brown like Chocolate for your neutrals. And a bright color like Sunset Orange or a rich shade like Blue Spruce convey a bold sophistication.
Know Your Worth
Maybe the divorce destroyed your self esteem. Maybe the marriage did. It's time to up your self care game. You should have clothes that you look forward to wearing. If you're going to see your ex, you want an outfit that lets them know that you've rediscovered your self worth. And it will remind you as well.